Archives for March 7, 2023

Delegation Daunting You?

Original Post: Shamina Taylor Facebook

I remember one thing that stuck with me from the one and only UPW Tony Robbins event I attended back in 2016, he said one of the key pillars to success is delegation.

Knowing how to do this can change the success and longevity of your business.

I am here to say he is right.

You knowing what your zone of genius is and knowing when to ask for support and LET PEOPLE support you will change everything.

The women I mentor don’t always have the easiest time finding their dream support team.

They have a hard time trusting the support will always be there. So they are very careful how much they let them help or how much they will let themselves depend on that help for fear it could up and leave.

They are sometimes convinced, good help is hard to find…

I can’t find the right help.

I can’t trust people to help me.

Or why hire help?

When I can do it faster myself.

One issue with highly successful women I mentor is they think they are superwoman and yes in many ways they are.

But they have a hard time letting go and trusting people will be there for them. There is also a lack mindset on spending money on support too (this is for another post).

They end up having:

High team turnovers.

Micromanaging people.

Frustration and resentment because they aren’t supported.

Exhausted from doing WAY too much in their business because it is easier and faster (according to them).

They like things their way.

They like to control everything.

They are perfectionists and people don’t ever do it like them.

For the first year of my business, I did have a hard time letting someone in and letting myself receive support. It was so foreign to me.

I didn’t understand why until I did.

It honestly never felt safe to receive help, even when I was PAYING FOR IT. I had an abandonment wound show up there. And a feminine wound self sacrificing myself all the time and not knowing it was safe to receive help.

Then when I got clear what kind of help I needed, I found my unicorn team member and I remember I subconsciously was always secretly waiting for her to leave. It was still scary!

So I kept paying her more. I didn’t also want to give her too much to do. Every time she would reassure me she loved supporting me and wasn’t going anywhere.

I didn’t know what it felt like to fully be supported because to be honest I had been in my wounded masculine doing bad all by myself everywhere in my life. And as a single mama you are wearing every single hat.

Letting my guard down and letting someone help me was one of the biggest game changers for me growing as a leader and business owner.

I finally felt safe to really be supported and receive help. And it changed how I showed up.

I learned to delegate. Like a boss!

And started hiring more aligned team members.

Then I also knew when to let people go. Because another thing we do is keep misaligned people in our company for way too long because of that need to struggle through things and that abandonment wound (insert familiar toxic cycles we know and endure).

You get to be supported fully.

You get to find your unicorn loyal team members who are there to support you and your mission and vision.

Without support you cannot go very far.

With a team you can do so much.

Don’t limit yourself.

You get to delegate.

You get to be supported.

You have a big impact to make!

This also allows you to enjoy that time and location freedom. Knowing your business is taken care of when you’re gone.

And caveat you don’t need a huge team (because we want a profit driven business too). Find a team who will love your mission as much as you do. Ones who care deeply for the cause.

You Get To Have A “BOTH” Life

Original Post: Shamina Taylor Facebook

You can’t have both.

You have to choose.

It’s one OR the other.

I was having a discussion with someone over the weekend and they said I would rather be wealthy, have experiences in life, and not buy things.

Cool.

You don’t want both.

That is your prerogative.

Not me. I want ALL of it.

I see posts all the time talking about this.

Where people proclaim, I would rather spend my money enjoying life. Having vacations then things.

It’s like there is a belief if you choose one you cannot have the other. And if you wanted the “things” it would make you a bad person or greedy.

I want BOTH.

I know I can have both, so I want both.

Both are available.

If you believe you can only have one, then yes there is a painful choice to be made.

Whatever we assign meaning to is what we get.

I personally don’t feel we have to choose.

I can have BOTH.

I believe it is both.

Both is expansive, which means there are no limits.

OR mentality = You can’t have both. So you need to choose.

NOW, I know I can have whatever it is I desire.

So I don’t need to choose.

So many are taught at a young age, pick one. You only get one little Susie, don’t be greedy.

And as a child, you want both.

But you are taught very early this isn’t a “both” life.

Why?

Because we don’t want them to be entitled or think life can come easy.

*Insert struggle mentality*

It’s to keep them humble so they know in order to be successful they need to work hard REALLY HARD.

YET…

The majority of the women who I mentor don’t have the expansiveness of both even though they are the most hardworking women you will ever meet (p.s. handwork doesn’t equally wealthy).

In fact, they limit themselves so much that what they do is NEVER enough.

So they never know how expansive they can be, or life can be. Because they resort back to the OR mentality, not both.

Their mindset is…

Only if I need it, only if it is necessary.

Rarely just because they desire it.

They don’t feel deserving of both.

And I know some will justify when they don’t want both and say….

‘It just doesn’t excite me.’

Really?

Or are you just limiting yourself justifying why you are settling for OR.

I am here to tell you….

You can have both if you choose both.

MORE IS COMING!

Would You Wear A 61-Carat Ring?

Original Post: Shamina Taylor Facebook

This guy made a post about how he was having dinner with his friend who drove a Bugatti.

And while they were at dinner they were eyeing this guy’s watch while he was dining with his wife.

The wife was wearing a 61-carat canary 80 million dollar diamond ring they bought from a museum and they had been married for 30 years.

I read this and I naturally went and googled a 61-carat ring. I mean you probably will too lol.

My friend owned a 6-carat rock the size of my eyeball so I couldn’t imagine what a 61-carat ring would look like.

Oh and the guy they were looking at apparently owned t-shirt factories in Bangladesh. Let’s assume the entire story is true.

What was interesting about it was the comments…..many were very supportive…then the ones who weren’t.

It is always so interesting to see how people react toward another’s wealth. What judgments they make tell me so much about their money mindset.

One commenter said (I am paraphrasing), I would never want to be married to a woman who felt it was okay to wear an 80 million dollar ring. That money could go to charity and change the world.

It could.

He assumed we had to throw the whole wife away because she wore a ring with a certain value.

I mean if it was 100k would we still throw her away?

Judgment.

I mean you’re entitled to it.

No one is stopping judgment.

Don’t try to.

But I can guarantee you this man’s thinking is limiting what is truly available for him to receive in this lifetime.

Another guy said (I am paraphrasing again), I bet he pays his employees $5 an hour and they work in sweat factories, why doesn’t he pay his people better with that money? He made up a whole scenario and story in minutes.

He might. I don’t know.

How many times have we done that?

Based upon our judgments.

We ASSUME things because we think our way is the right and only way.

Then this big long story we’ve made up gets attached very quickly to who people are from their success or what they have.

MONEY will bring out everything that is hiding deep in you about what you feel about YOURSELF.

Want to know where your money issues are, check in with your judgments.

What was your reaction when you read someone owned an 80 million dollar ring and was wearing it?

You know that saying when we judge others, we are actually judging ourselves.

Next time you see yourself judging how other people spend their money, invest their money, spend their money, make their money….including yourself.

STOP and ask yourself why am I so invested in how and why people are using their money.

What does this have anything to do with me?

It’s not taking away from you, is it?

I mean it might feel like it if you don’t live in abundance.

I mean they are printing the paper right this second.

It isn’t running out.

Whatever we assign meaning to becomes our reality.

I got EXPANDED with the idea of a 61-carat rock. I mean she can miss arm day at the gym with that rock.

Others let their limited mindset show, they saw what they DIDN’T have, what wasn’t available to them.

When your default is lack, you will ALWAYS judge everything.

Money doesn’t buy happiness.

But, I am here for the human experience and if it involves experiencing whatever I desire, I am going to experience it as bougie and fancy as I want to.

Because I can. How bout you?